I wake up from the burning wreckage. Dang. That chopper was brand new and sparkly. Now it is all burning and dilapidated. Well, at least I’m still alive and I’m super human.
Oh no. The T-virus isn’t bonding to my body correctly. I need to eat human flesh to stabilize myself.
Where’s Alice? I want to eat her. She is the only known human to fully bond with the virus. Eating her will allow me to become super powerful. Oh. She isn’t here? Darn. She must have woken up before me somehow. Wait a minute, I thought I was the super human here!
Where do I go now? Let’s go to one of Umbrella’s many secret base. It is a ship. It is a ship named Arcadia.
*Six months later*
There’s a plane? Someone’s flying to Arcadia? Who is it? Let’s use the magical Satellite Voice amplifier along with the Umbrella Heat signature finder. If we had this technology all along, why didn’t we use it to capture that Claire girl?
But, Arcadia is moving south to LA for no reason. Should I tell the crew to stop and wait for Alice to land on the ship so I can eat her? Or at least head back north and send out flares or radio signals to the plane telling her to land? Let’s not.
*A couple of days later*
Oh look, Alice landed at a prison facility along with other survivors.
I most definitely want to consume her, so I’ll send some bio-monsters to go and kill her. Yes, these monsters must be deadly. I hope Alice makes it out alive.
*Another few days later.*
Gee, is that a plane that’s heading to the boat? Does everyone know how to fly a plane? Apparently. Is it Alice? No? Hm.
Wait, that’s Alice and Claire coming on a boat. Alice is coming to this room right now! Let’s talk. And not seal the room via the computer controls so anyone can sneak through at any time. Besides, I like to fight more people while my horribly mutated dogs fight other people.
Muahaha. Look at their slow bullets fly. I can move so fast. I am powerful. Now, the Redfields are out of commission.
Should I use my super speed (fast enough to dodge bullets) to knock Alice out and finally eat her? Nope.
Let’s slow motion try to eat her. Ow! There’s a knife in my brain. Good thing I can recover from that! Let’s try again. Hopefully, Alice doesn’t have another weapon that can be shot in my face.
Darn, I guessed wrong. She did shoot it in my face. I am going to fake die.
Muahaha I am alive again, and I’m going to eat this old man to regain my complete strength. Since I’ve proven that I am too dumb to even kill three ‘normal’ powered humans, I’m going to escape. I hope that the one chopper out of a dozen or so isn’t booby trapped by Alice’s only self destruct device.
Bah. I am now dead. Darnit. I was so dumb and unlucky.