The life you live is mostly determined by yourself. Nobody was scheming at your birth to make your life miserable.
I believe that most of us are blessed with a life that's not limited by problems of food, money, or shelter.
Thus, you ultimately shape how you became.
No matter how angry you are at what you are, you still don't have the right to treat other people like dirt. It isn't going to help you.
Don't feel sorry for yourself either. You would be stuck in a self-defeating/hating loop as your life becomes more miserable due to your inaction.
You still have time to change.
29 May 2009
25 May 2009
Perfectly Normal
I've been doing a lot of thinking recently and I've come to the conclusion that I don't want to die.
At least not from any illness or decapitation.
Yesterday, I was walking through the mall when I saw a pair of lovely kids running around bumping into things. It was all very cute until they started kicking into the air, and eventually they went up to perfectly normal strangers and started kicking them. The victim turned to them and told them to stop, but they won't. He lifted them up by the arms (hanging) and walked to the parents. I'm sure they had a good conversation, but it didn't feel right for me to listen.
Yesterday, I saw a woman die. She choked on her own vomit and nobody helped her by moving her to the side. Hey dying would have solved a lot of problem for everyone, but she didn't really deserve to die. Would I have done it in Mr. White's shoes? Or I have let her die the same way? Probably not. (You should all watch Breaking Bad.)
At least not from any illness or decapitation.
Yesterday, I was walking through the mall when I saw a pair of lovely kids running around bumping into things. It was all very cute until they started kicking into the air, and eventually they went up to perfectly normal strangers and started kicking them. The victim turned to them and told them to stop, but they won't. He lifted them up by the arms (hanging) and walked to the parents. I'm sure they had a good conversation, but it didn't feel right for me to listen.
Yesterday, I saw a woman die. She choked on her own vomit and nobody helped her by moving her to the side. Hey dying would have solved a lot of problem for everyone, but she didn't really deserve to die. Would I have done it in Mr. White's shoes? Or I have let her die the same way? Probably not. (You should all watch Breaking Bad.)
09 May 2009
Forsaken Class
This past week ranks pretty low in the scenes of my life.
Surveying class is brutal, especially when they squeeze the equivalent of a 13 week class into two weeks - 12 days (including saturdays).
I get home really tired and I just want to sleep, but there's like 1-2 hours of homework that needs to be done for the following day.
I just can't do this anymore.
Good thing there's only one more week.
Anyway, I'm still trying to get that Mars story up and running, I've got about two segments out of 7 done. I still think I can do it, but I just need to have it stew around in my mind some more.
Working on another thing that's kind of out there. It is interesting, but ideas jump very quickly and far apart.
Surveying class is brutal, especially when they squeeze the equivalent of a 13 week class into two weeks - 12 days (including saturdays).
I get home really tired and I just want to sleep, but there's like 1-2 hours of homework that needs to be done for the following day.
I just can't do this anymore.
Good thing there's only one more week.
Anyway, I'm still trying to get that Mars story up and running, I've got about two segments out of 7 done. I still think I can do it, but I just need to have it stew around in my mind some more.
Working on another thing that's kind of out there. It is interesting, but ideas jump very quickly and far apart.
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